The following question was posted under Women’s Heath. I sorted the responses, so top rated answer for this gem of a question is just below the question.

Steamy Vagina

I came across an image on another site, which was a screen cap of a question asked in the Decorating & Remodeling section of Yahoo! Answers, and I laughed so hard that I decided to see the question for myself.

A quick Google search led me right to the question.

The question asked was “What is a meat curtain?“

I’m not even joking. No photoshop. You can view the question page here.

I can almost understand not knowing what a meat curtain is, or what it means when the carpet (or rug) and the drapes don’t match, but why would your first step be to ask people on Yahoo! Answers? Do the right thing and Google it first, just like everyone else on earth.

It looks like Boost Mobile is continuing its trend of shit commercials that annoy the hell out of me. This time, they’ve chosen to change it up and offer a duo of commercials starring Georgie, a play on George Washington and the dollar bill. Now, instead of Boost Mobile being the hip choice, Boost Mobile is selling itself as the cheap choice in cellular service.

The only positive thing I can say about the new ad campaign is that they seem to have dropped the Where You At? slogan. At least for now.

Everything else I can say is negative. I watched a behind-the-scenes video on the Georgie ad campaign and I was not impressed. You can’t have George Washington spew slang to push the great value of a dollar in the new pricing plans and expect to sell me on it. To start, Georgie sounds mentally challenged. He’s trying to rap, but he sounds like a douche trying to make himself seem more important than he actually is. To top it off, these commercials play as often as any other Boost Mobile commercial has ever played, so it repeatedly violates my eardrums. I have to wonder how much money Boost Mobile is pushing into these ad campaigns and what the return rate is.

Here’s an analogy for you: Georgie is to George Washington as Kanye West is to Elvis Presley.

If I only had $30 each month to spend on a cell phone and Boost Mobile was the only provider with a plan I could afford, I would only have a cell phone every other month because I would use two months of cell phone savings to pay for a single month of another provider.

I just realized something. Boost Mobile is abbreviated BM. So is bowel movement. That’s pure summary right there.

It really irks me to see people reply to a post and ask a stupid question because they didn’t read the entire post before replying. The question being asked is totally off subject of the post. What I have just read is an example, which I have posted below.

Wouldn’t it have helped the person replying to simply read the full post, and know that the poster was asking if each project could be updated with new episodes, instead of just adding new projects.

Maybe I have an uncanny ability to read and comprehend.

I can accept slang as part of every day life, in moderation, but somehow it became gauche to speak properly. Now slang has run rampant and become the predominant element of communication. Well, excuse me for my sentence structure and proper use of words actually found in a dictionary.

I’m not saying that I’m completely above it. I have been known to utter slang in brief moments of verbal diarrhea, or in my habitual use of the word “dude” – which I’ve made a valiant effort to abate using it, or even when making a joke in the imitation of slang-slinging simians. I am not perfect, nor do I expect anyone else to be. That is why I have a tolerance for slang. Do not mistake this for an acceptance, however.

You may be wondering what inspired this post. What could have happened that sparked this outburst? Let me explain.

I’ve recently started watching the Starz series Crash. After having seen the movie back in 2004, I found out that it was originally written to be a TV series. So, when the series was announced, I was quite excited to see what would be done with the story. Unfortunately, Crash airs Friday nights, and I’m almost always working then. I had to catch up on the previous episodes, which led me to watching the first five episodes over this weekend, and then watching the sixth episode earlier today. The sixth episode is what got to me.

For those of you who have not watched the sixth episode, or any other episode of the series, please do not let the following text deter you. Truthfully, I’m enjoying the show, but the dialogue from a single scene is so terrible that I had to post it. I’ve tried to get the text right, so I’ve written it the way it was spoken. The dialogue is between Anthony and his friend Kief^? and is as follows:

Keif: I know you fillin’ it. You was out here makin’ dat guap. Drivin’ limos and hangin’ wit rappers and shit.

Anthony: Yeah, it would have been the bomb job if our boy hadn’t nutted up.

Keif: He ain’t no imigrant, is he?

Anthony: Whatchu talkin ’bout fool?

Keif: I’m sayin’. We need to go out there and gank this fool for the ched he owe you. You wantcho bread, homie, you gotta take it.

Anthony: Hell naw, man. We can’t do that.

Keif: Why not? You said he was paid!

Anthony: He is, man.

Keif: You said he got so much bread, man, stashed in jelly jars all around his crib, he don’t know how much he got. We already in the car. Let’s just roll over there and see what’s good.

Anthony: You mean case the joint?

Keif: Shit. If it’s gravy, we on. And if it’s not, den we jus chill. Dude, you don’t owe Ben. He owe you! What about those masters? He prolly done sold dem mo’ fuckus.

Anthony: Man, look. Nigga, you don’t think the cops gonna suspect the disgruntled black employee? Come on, man.

Keif: Man, we can go over yo’ uncle shop right afterward. It’s the perfect alibi. Nigga, you forget. Ben Cendars owe you!

Really? What the fuck just happened?

Yesterday, I posted my observations on women who shave their eyebrows and paint them back on, and I photoshopped an image of Angelina Jolie to illustrate a point. You can look back on that post here: Shaved Eyebrows Are Sexy.

In the post, I stopped editing the Angelina Jolie picture after I had painted on her new eyebrows. For this post, I’ve gone all the way and transformed Angelina into a clown in full makeup.

I had a lot of fun doing this manipulation, and it’s been a while since I’ve really done anything in Photoshop, so this was a much needed break from the norm. Even if only for 20 minutes.

Angelina Jolie
Clowning Around

Angelina Jolie
Shaved Eyebrows

Eww…

I’ve been flipping through deviantART‘s newest submissions and I’m starting to see a trend. I mean, besides the standard gay anime and anthro crap. The trend is, as the title suggests, that some women feel the need to shave off their eyebrows.

I can’t say I have any understanding as to why some women choose to shave off their eyebrows, just to paint them back on! Actually, I can extend this lack of understanding to include why some women choose to shave off their eyebrows period.

I think the thing that irks me the most is that some of the women that shave-and-paint would be very attractive if they left their eyebrows alone!

I’m sure the idea is to NOT look like a clown, but they all fail miserably.

I’ve taken the liberty of shaving Angelina Jolie’s eyebrows to illustrate my point.

In the top picture, you see Angelina in her natural form – albeit tarted up with makeup. Very sexy.

In the middle picture, I’ve shaved her eyebrows off. Still sexy, but with a “there’s definitely something wrong with this picture, but I can figure out what” look to it.

Finally, the third picture, I’ve painted the standard high-arc black eyebrows on her. She’s white makeup and a clown nose shy of looking like a clown. A very sexy clown.

Maybe using Angelina Jolie was a bad choice… To be continued…

Unfortunately, their site says I must wait an indefinite amount of time before someone approves my request, so I just have to wait.

Too bad for me, however, since I hate having to wait!!

Boost Mobile Anthem 2
Young Jeezy, Jermaine Dupri, and Mickey Avalon

If you’ve watched TV at all this year, you’ve probably seen the Boost Mobile Anthem 2 commercial at least once. Chances are, if you watch TV regularly, you’ve seen it dozens of times. The commercial stars Young Jeezy, Jermaine Dupri, and Mickey Avalon raping an annoying song that ends with the Boost Mobile slogan Where you at?

I’ve had the unfortunate pleasure of seeing this fucking commercial two dozen times just today! (I’ve discovered FEARnet On Demand, which is sponsored by Boost Mobile.) It’s very easy to be annoyed by this commercial, so imagine trying to not be annoyed when it’s on every 30 minutes. You would be as angry as I am.

The hatred I have for this commercial extends to all of the Boost Mobile commercials. They’re idiotic, ignorant, and all annoying in their own way.

It also doesn’t help that the Boost Mobile slogan Where you at? is so ignorantly incorrect that it alone makes me angry. Is it so hard to speak correctly? There’s no verb and the question ends with a preposition! How about, “Where are you?” I guess that’s not catchy enough.

I don’t know the quality of service you get by using Boost Mobile, and I’m not going to speculate or debate how good the service is, but these commercials are absolutely horrible and they do not speak well for the company or the service provided. If I used the commercials as the sole basis for deciding which cell phone provider to go with, Boost Mobile would be at the bottom of the list.

Oh, yeah. The commercial is on the right if you’re mental enough to want to watch it. You’ve been warned!

Where you at? I be where I’m am at. Don’t hate!

I feel dirty all over now.

I’m sure many of the people who use Yahoo! Answers are younger, less educated people, but everyone who is able to use a computer should be able to ask a complete and sensible question.

I have to pose my own questions, then. What makes people think they are going to get help – an answer to their question – when they phrase the question so poorly that you aren’t even sure what they are really asking? How do you answer a question that someone really needs help with, but the question does not make sense?

I’ll list some examples of true brilliance. I can’t make this shit up. These questions were really asked. You’ll have to trust me, or search for yourself.

The format for questions is: Main question? Explanation of question.

1. I heard a song on the radio but I don’t remember any of the words. It went “Laaa lala laaaaa lalala la. La lala la.” Can you tell me who sings it and what song it is?
2. War I mean like whats that about?
3. Where does butterflies live? butterfly lives in meadows….
4. What do you think this looks like? I need some one to look at a picture of something I made and tell me what you think it looks like? [no picture included]

To top everything off, Yahoo! Answers gives you points for answering regardless of what you answer with! What you have are people with advanced levels who are providing the answer “search google” for everything, thus further advancing their levels. It also makes it dificult to find people who are really looking for answers but haven’t gotten any yet.

I’m doing my best to help people who really need the help, and you can do the same if you sign up with Yahoo! Answers. I can’t say that it’s a great place to go if you have questions, but it’s definitely a place to try. Who knows. Maybe I’ll end up answering your question!